Okay, I am really glad I took a couple notes while I was watching last week's ep, because I probably would have forgotten some of the great shit that went down, starting with Blayne's weird retardologue about Mary Kate Olsen: "Maybe it's MaryKate! I want every challenge to be about Mary Kate. I want to marry Mary Kate. Who doesn't? Except Tim Gunn."
Ok, Blayne...WTF dude? Mary Kate? Well, I guess it makes sense. They both have the ability to work the drug bag look, so I guess they would make a great couple.
I want to understand the taped lines on the mannequins. I think this is another thing I need to take a sewing class for.
I actually think the lines represent where the lines of the garment should be. If you watch them when they drape, they tend to follow the lines they have places on the dress form.
Not only was Stella looking stunning again, but I want to buy tickets IMMEDIATELY for the STELLA V. RACHEL ZOE fight night! I don't remember the specifics, but I DO know that Zoe's stupid hyper-boho floaty twirly dumbshit aesthetic was called out, and it was the best thing maybe ever.
Rachel Zoe is another one of the many famous people who I don't quite understand why they're famous. She dresses like shit, so yeah, I would love to watch Stella pound on her head like she does when she's working on her leatha.
Loved Heidi's "walk out backwards, ding ding ding" comment...I wish I could remember who she was saying it to, but the whole "ding ding ding" with the Heidi full body bob action was so great. I totally love her.
I also loved Kenley's dress with the feathers and iris print, which was just another annoying component of this episode re: Kenley. I have absolutely had it with Kenley, but she reacted to Diane von Furstenburg exactly as I imagine I would (only with less drool and scary hugging) and really seemed to feel the magnitude of the challenge more than others. Stupid wench.
I seriously hate Kenley, and although she did grasp the full magnitude of the challenge, she does not grasp how not be a giant fucking annoying irritating bitch. I think her personal style is overplayed and not really original. Her mouth full of teeth usually distracts me from what she wears, so I don't even think I noticed what she had on.
DING DING DING BITCH
Jerell...this doesn't really scream DvF to me, but I can see where he was going with the German spy vibe and everything. I don't know...it looks almost stumpy to me. The blouse is kind of floaty and free, but so is the top jackety thing, which makes the whole thing kind of sloppy looking. It just ALL looks too soft, which would have been okay if not for the stucture of the pencil skirt and the belt to contrast. The less said about the hat, the better. The first thing that threw me off about this look was the belt, which the look kind of needed, but definitely not in that color. I do get the spy vibe as well, although he needs to cut the shit with the ugly ass hats. He's like Ricky. Jerrell is really hit and miss for me, and this one was definitely a miss. This whole look is just pretty much blah.
Joe...what the fuck is this? I mean, the model is not helping here, but it was gross at any speed. The fabrics looked tacky, the idea was weird, it didn't fit ANY of the possible categories...I don't know how Joe didn't get eliminated, and I'm not even saying that out of any ill will. I was amazed Heidi didn't go into some kind of cheap-fabric fugue state. You know how she gets. I seriously cannot believe he wasn't the one to get aufed in this challenge. I hated everything about this, from the stupid backless top to the ugly hooded whatever the hell it's supposed to be. It did look cheap, and it didn't fit in with her collection at all. It seriously sucked. Someone got lucky.
Blayne...weirdly enough, I like all of this, I'm just not sure I like it together. The jacket is great, like, I want to own it levels of great. The scarf is the perfect pop of color. The pants...I dunno. I never thought I'd be willing to sign off on pantaloons, but these are kind of awesome. I could see them with a fitted tee or something and some spindlier heels. I might be totally out of my gourd here, but I'm standing by it. I also loved the jacket. It's totally awesome. I dig the pants as well. I just think this is a really edgy high fashion look. Not everyone can wear it, but on the right person it could be really cool. I'm perfectly ok with you standing by this because I would as well. Everything about it is cool.
Korto...I am in total love with this fabric. I think we talked about how DvF used it in the dress in her fall collection and AmEx commercial. I find that a lot of Korto's stuff is a lot more interesting while it's moving, so this picture is a little unfortunate. That being said, I loved the addition of the yellow fabric, but I don't get the bolero-y shrug situation in play here. I HATED the detail along the neckline...it looked like bra straps! Middle of the road. This fabric does kick ass. I have a skirt with a very similar swirly pattern and I love it. The little plaque of yellow really punches this up and gives it the bit of edge it needed to keep it from being mediocre. The yellow on the top is stupid but I did like the bolero, actually. I think I like it because you can wear it with other stuff. I liked this one.
Leanne...again, two pieces I like separately. The coat is cute, though as with most short coats, I would prefer it buttoned. The dress was beautiful...totally elegant. That being said, I don't really get them together, even in the name of the spy aesthetic. See, I thought these two items went perfectly together. I kind of viewed the coat as something she'd wear over it when she was outside. I loved the dress and if I had the type of body that could pull it off, I'd want it. I thought she deserved the win.
Kenley...whatever, it's a cute dress. It's not HALF of what Kenley thought it was, and it doesn't really fit into any of the categories she could have gone with. I know she was aiming for the Taiwanese vibe, but I don't think it particularly screams that, either. Also, I hate Kenley. I like the print and it's cute. Other than that, Kenley needs to shut the fuck up and get over herself.
Suede...yeah, I understood nothing about this. The dress fabric was just shrieking upholstery, and the vest/jacket was totally out of left field. I don't think this pic really shows how hiptastic it was, either...WAY too much pouf! I have no idea what he was thinking. This made no sense - the dress and the vest have nothing to do with each other. Kinda ugly, really boring.
Terri...there is some EXTREME camel toe at work here. Good god. That being said, I do think it's a product of the model's crappy posture, and not the actual pants, which were pretty nice. I will say, Terri is going to need to branch out sometime soon. I like her clothes, but she does do the same kind of stuff a lot, and the judges are going to get all pissy about it right quick. I didn't really like the firework print on the blouse. This outfit could have fit into the spy concept but for the fireworks...they're just too young and too light for the spy vibe. I thought the fireworks were fun, but I didn't think they were appropriate for this challenge. I do think the posture is affecting those pants because I don't remember them being that bad on the runway. It's ok, I guess.
Stella...oh Stella, you tried. I liked the IDEA of the vest okay, but she didn't anticipate the challenges of the different fabrics properly. I would also prefer buttons to a tie, but that's a personal problem. The pants actually look okay, and I appreciate that she tried, but yeah, that vest was a hot mess. I felt as though Stella got screwed. She at least tried to branch out of her normal style and I thought her outfit had a concept, even if the execution wasn't so great. How is this worse than Joe's? I don't get it.
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