This is Why No One Wants Healthcare

Dear Departments and Registries of Motor Vehicles,

I bet you guys' feelings have really taken a beating listening to people bitch about how they don't want national heathcare because the USPS and RMVs are terrible, poorly run government agencies and any national health system would be just as crappy and probably inject babies with poison. That really sucks, and I have to say, I've defended you many times to people making that argument. There are plenty of ways to argue against national healthcare, I would say, but ths USPS and RMV Argument is a weak approach.

Well let me tell you something...I have come up with a way to make people stop dissing you. You know how? STOP HIRING HEINOUS WENCHES AND HAVING OBNOXIOUS HOLD SYSTEMS THAT KEEP YOU LISTENING TO LOW-GRADE MUZAK FOR FORTY GODDAMN MINUTES.

All I wanted to do was re-register a company vehicle. I applied online, and you sent me an email all "sorry, no can do, call this number." I called once, thinking that I'd be able to get it sorted out no problem and move on my life, but thirty minutes of non-refundable life later, I had to go cover lunch for the temp downstairs. I got back a while later and dialed again, only to be on hold forty damn minutes, interrupted by alternating male and female voices telling me they cared, but couldn't talk right now. (Confidential to every automated system purchaser in the world - this only makes people angrier.)

That wouldn't really be a problem if the woman who picked up the phone wasn't the bitchiest sounding cranky ass I've had to talk to all damn week. You know what lady, I JUST WANT TO RENEW MY GODDAMN REGISTRATION. If I could have avoided talking to your unpleasant self, I would have, but your own idiotic website conspired against you SO HERE WE ARE.

So in conclusion, I'm GLAD people are being mean to you, RMV, because you have EARNED IT.

Die in a fire,

Me

PS - We have to go in and show them proof of insurance, because apparently at whatever stargate the RMV is operating from fax machines and scanning have not been invented.