Friday, March 28, 2008

Walmart: Not So Smiley

There is no time left in the history of the world for me to thoroughly enumerate the reasons I hate Walmart. I don't shop there, and quite frankly, there aren't that many entire retail locations I'll boycott on principle. However, when confronted with a store that's the moral equivalent of a building completely consumed by flames with some dude dressed in a red outfit with horns an a pitchfork trying to get you to come in and check out their blow out sale on locusts, I'm sorry, but I'll take a fucking pass. Just a brief rundown of assorted Walmart fucktardery...

  1. Their track record on treating women like the 19th Amendment ever happened is fucking abysmal.

  2. They violate child labor laws, which again might be an issue with the space-time continuum.

  3. The conga line of general worker abuse is eleventy billion miles long...starting with some relatively minor shit like not meeting a minimum wage and continuing on to deciding it was cheaper to wash injured workers' blood out of manufactured clothes than get the proper safety equipment.

  4. Did I mention the whole "flexible scheduling" thing, where Walmart basically was trying to force all its full-timers into the part-time job from hell?

  5. Not to mention the shitty healthcare, which is...inadequate at best.

  6. If you're a right of contract advocate and don't care what Walmart does to its own employees, you might also want to note that they don't particularly care about the quality of what they sell you or whether it will give you horrendous chemical burns on your feet.

  7. I personally just find the overall aesthetics of the stores so gross that even if they weren't the Corporate AntiChrist, I just don't like being in there.

I won't say that today's little piece of karmic bitchslap makes up for all Walmart's sins, but I certainly know how devastating the loss of a trademark or logo can be to a company...and I'll take any retribution I can get.

Kiss your smiley face goodbye, Walmart!

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