Happy Birthday, Pentameter!

YAY it is my friend Pentameter's birthday! Thanks Pentameter's Mom and Dad, your kid is an awesome friend!

As you all may know, I am not a bajillionaire, so I am currently limited to how many millions I can lavish on my friends to celebrate their births, but I WISH I could spend zillions and also give them private planes and pilots so we could all visit each other ALL THE TIME and it would be great. (PS - Kids, don't ever go to college or write on the Internet. You will meet cool people and they will live in places like "Europe" and "Washington State" and "Pennsylvania.") Anyhoodle, if I was a gajillionaire (soon!), this is what would be arriving on Pentameter's doorstep today.

It would probably also arrive on time, because I would have a personal assistant to counteract my tendency for procrastination and forgetfulness. It is a deadly combo.

The Cirrus SR22 is not only snazzy looking in the extreme, but is also the SAFEST available small aircraft thanks to it's superawesome, industry-leading whole-plane parachute, which ensures that as long as you do not direct your plane into a tree, you will not be smushed, EVEN if your engine conks out in midair. Includes pilot.

If you need an explanation as to why I would give these to ANY friend, you are dead to me. If you need help understanding why I cannot give these to Pentameter, I can help - they are Christian Louboutins and they cost over $700.

Charm bracelet from C.H.A.R.M., which is a rilly rilly cool charm store that I cannot really afford for my own or my friends' charm bracelet needs. I would start Pentameter out with this bracelet and these charms...the shoe, boot, and corsety thing to appeal to her fashion instincts, sewing machine for her craftiness (and any repairs on the run if necessary!), Passport so she can do lots and lots of travel without worrying about nefarious foreign persons ganking her identity, baseball player because we know the secret of the Rivalry (hint! Don't act like a moron all the time!), Italy because the woman couldn't BE more Italian, and the little hearts on a bench and the door mostly because I think they're neat, and shopping for stuff we like personally in order to find something for the giftee is never a wrong choice with Pentameter and I.

Brooch from Kristen Grace, not only because it would look fucking fly on a nice winter coat, but also because it is called "Indira" and Pentameter and I are all about the GIRL POWER and the getting overly agitated from reading feminist blogs.
Just because I know she could rock it.

This dress by Jay McCarroll from the first season of Project Runway, and an occasion to wear it to, because seriously...wow. PENNSYLVANIA PRIDE!
Tim Gunn, who is back in our good graces after cancelling our planned rendezvous, to provide endless guidance, fantasticality, and general fun. (Confidential to Tim: Don't worry, the delay just gives us more time to figure out how to cajole you into coming out with us for drinks after the book signing.)

Finally, the Harvard Coop, the bestest bookstore in the whole wide world, ideally minaturized for storage in a magical bag for transportation, a la Merlin-in-Disney's-Sword-in-the-Stone or Hermione-in-the-Deathly-Hallows, depending on your personal vintage. Full of both academic and fun books, as well as many awesome reading-oriented tools and knickknacks and a yummy cafe, this bookstore is sure to keep Pentameter busy and happy until roughly the end of the universe.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, WOMAN!