Let's talk about things I do.
I go to college full time. I take 5 classes Monday, Wednesday and Friday, all of which have reading I have to do on Tuesday, Thursday and the weekends, along with any assorted papers and presentations.
I also work on the aforementioned Tuesdays and Thursdays, where I always THINK I am going to get reading done, but rarely do. I work in Westborough, which is 30-40 minutes from my house.
I work out twice a week for an hour with a trainer.
I have a knitting group after work on Tuesdays.
I do a bunch of stuff for the Sharks Booster Club, and that's what I'd like to talk about today.
I really love the Sharks. I love the people in the front office, they get it, they know hockey. I love the Boosters, for the most part, and enjoy spending time with them. I love seeing Fiona and Shrek and our section family and all the other people around the arena. I like the DCU people and the interns and the games. I love the actual Sharks themselves - by and large, they are just a good bunch of guys, personable and funny.
When the Icecats left, it...sucked. I grew up there. I made friends there, I met throwaway boyfriends there, I had a handful of Christmases at the Centrum with my former section family in 117...I met Speed there. I knew all about the guys on the team and the teams in the league, all of that. It was like a second home. There was a year after they left where there was no team, and that was just horrendous...the upside, I guess, is that it gave Speed's and my relationship a chance to gestate, but still...no hockey. Speed basically strongarmed a new team into town, and that was good...the Sharks seemed like a good group and in the inaugural season, they proved it. We joined the Booster Club, Speed became President, and at the end of the year I'd somehow managed to be named Booster of the Year.
It was also the first time I'd had the weird sensation of enjoying losing. This is not to say the team sucked and lost all the time. They were kings of the comeback, though, to the point that they'd be down by 2 and we'd all start joking about how they had the other team right where they wanted them. And kind of not be kidding. It was thrilling...they were a dynamic team and even watching them lose was more exciting than half the wins I'd ever seen. They made the playoffs, and that was great.
This year, while it's mathematically possible for them to qualify, they're not going to do it playing like this. And that is not fair.
I don't really know who to blame. These guys, by and large, do not suck. There are some guys who could be phenomenal with some polish. When Lukas Kaspar hits the afterburners, you just straight up cannot catch him. When Mike Iggulden decides to show up for a game, he's fantastic. When the defense is cranking and Thomas Greiss and Dimitri Patzold actually have some crease to play with, they are unbeatable.
So why aren't these things happening?
I don't have a solid answer. I put a lot of it on the coach, but not being in the locker room, I don't know that I can point that finger. I DO know that sometimes, no matter how much of a big kid you are, you need a kick in the ass. I don't see that happening on the ice, and quite honestly, I think that's usually where you need it most. When you're not playing, you have plenty of time to work up a guy's motivation and psych him up. But let's have it said...20 minutes isn't long. Not at that pace. There's definitely not time to dick around and wait for the guy who's dragging ass to come to his senses, adopt a heroic pose and Do It For Love. Sometimes when you're in the shit, you just feed on your own frustration and keep screwing up. I also take serious issue with the moronic line changes and the coach's total inability to take a goddamn timeout. Look, this is basic logic.
Point of hockey = putting small rubber critter past a large man with mattresses strapped to his legs and into a net.
Method of acccomplishing above goal = guys with sticks and knives strapped to their feet do whatever they can to push it in.
Ergo, if there are no goddamn PEOPLE in the FUCKING RED ZONE, how in the HELL do you think you're going to get the puck in the goddamn net??? And yet game after game, night after night, this guy changes up as soon as the puck crosses the blue line. WHERE DID THIS GUY LEARN HOCKEY?
And with the time outs...he just doesn't call them, and often this falls into the same angry space with my motivational issues. Look, sometimes a goalie lets in two in a row, and it doesn't mean he needs to be pulled. Sometimes he just needs a slap-around. Sometimes a team needs the same. In either case, just CALL A DAMN TIMEOUT, give the peptalk and the game plan, and move on. Don't just let it drag on and hope something good will happen - be proactive.
I guess I should note that the reason I'm all hacked off is because they lost 3-1 to San Antonio last night in the most boring fucking game ever in the world without a HINT of fighting for the win.
I'd also like to talk a little bit about Jamie "Motherfucking" Koharski.
My first concious knowledge of Jamie Koharski was last season during a game against the Norfolk Admirals, and that game managed to get so fucking far out of his control that someone wound up being taken off the ice on a backboard. The Admirals were an ugly, fighty team last year, and the Sharks certainly were taking the bait, but there was no reason for a game with paid officials to get that out of hand. Since that game, he's been a consistently shitty referee...missing calls, ignoring calls, being oblivious, being an asshole...while variety may be the spice of life, no one needs a variety of ways to suck at something you get paid for.
Last night, Riley Armstrong, who, let's have it said, is a shit-stirrer to the core, got knocked down in front of the net, and some shitheel on the Rampage just started crosschecking him over and over and over. Where, you may wonder, was Koharski? Fucking nowhere to be seen. He finally tuned in by the 4th or 5th crosscheck - for those who don't know what I'm talking about, the Rampage player had his stick with a hand on each end of it, and was ramming the flat of his stick down repeatedly on Riley's shoulders, neck and back - and slapped the guy with a 5 minute major and a game misconduct.
Look, part of being a ref isn't just calling the right penalty, it's keeping the game safe. It's a violent game, and sometimes people just need a goddamn timeout. In this regard, Koharski has failed over and over and over and over, and that is fucking reprehensible. That man is going to be responsible for someone getting seriously, permanently hurt one of these days, and that is fucking terrible.
He should be out of a goddamn job.
Thursday, March 13, 2008
Monday, March 10, 2008
Electoral College
I'm taking Constitutional Law this semester, and have declared war on it. Usually when I haul out the war declaration paperwork, it's because I hate the class, but in this case, it's because I cannot seem to get my law brain engaged; I know how to read for Law Knowledge...paying attention to everyone who says anything, reading for concept AND opinion, etc., but for whatever reason, I cannot seem to get going, so I declared war on it.
Seriously, people, I got a 30 on my first quiz. Raise your hand if you think I'm actually that dumb.
The course is kind of a "Constitutional Law...with a twist!" kind of scene. We're going to be looking at the Constitution and how it's shaped law and government, then seeing how all that good stuff syncs up with current Constitutional issues like those at hand in Guantanamo Bay, with wiretapping, etc. The Professor is interested in that stuff, and it shows. Today, he handed out an article about how Democrats are squabbling (...I KNOW! So unusual and exciting!) about the superdelegates. For those who have been under a rock or just in a closet, twitching with election fatigue, the Democratic party has two candidates pretty close in delegate counts, and it looks like it will all come down to the votes of superdelegates, who are party muckety-mucks and have a full vote at the convention. Both the HRC and Obama camps are complaining about how this isn't fair, for varying reasons, and basically I think it's all stupid.
TANGENT ALERT*****TANGENT ALERT*****TANGENT ALERT
Look, here's my deal with the electoral college. In theory, I'm down with it. I'm okay with a representative democracy, that's fine, delegate it up. If I had my pick, I'd make it a national primary, over, done, no Iowa, no New Hampshire, no SuperTuesday, just everyone voting, minimal angst. However, in the current system, I really think we'd all benefit from switching to having the same system in both parties, by which I mean I think everyone should have primaries, NOT CAUCUSES (which are stupid), and the hell with superdelegates. The Democrats are supposed to be the party of the people, yet they integrate backroom smoke-and-mirroring into their candidate selection right out in the open! Reason I am totally making my own political party #98456265874658917659.
END TANGENT*****END TANGENT*****END TANGENT
In any case, I got to thinking about the genesis of the American electorate, and how the past three cycles have involved this kind of very close contest. It's been most notable in the Bush election cycles in 2000 and 2004, but has seeped into the primary process this year. I wonder if this closeness is an inevitable result of Constitutional structure or just a flukey coincidence. I think it's tough to say definitively.
Personally, I feel like it has a lot to do with the decline of voter turnout and the rise of "specialized" voting blocs, i.e. evangelicals turning out for Huckabee, anti-gay marriage blocs turning out for Bush. This might fall into that black hole of inevitability. The Constitution lead to the development of a capitalist society with a screening process for participation. Doesn't this make it seem like we were bound to wind up at this point? There's no national holiday for election day...people are reluctant to take the time off. Further, this means that the worse the economy gets, which most would agree is a good time for people to tune in and participate, the less likely people are to participate, because they can't afford the time off and corresponding hit in pay.
Though the above problems seem very modern, they're also a by-product of the society with which the Founders endowed us. When you read the Constitution and consider what has sprung forth from it, the document itself seems so...vague. It almost seems like that boss who gives you the employee handbook with a bunch of rules about what time to show up and how to avoid sexual harassment, then immediately starts saying things like "I want to make a rocket for lunar travel...and let's involved a kids' charity" before leaving the room and letting you figure out what the hell he's talking about and where you're going to get a rocket. It laid down fairly basic ground rules, but since then, we've developed a gigantic government and a sprawling legal system. The things that WERE specified formed a commercial republic, guaranteeing people would always be capitalistically driven and constantl held at an arm's length from actual political engagement.
With all that in mind, where are we now? Were we destined to wind up voting as blocs and electing Presidents by a hair's width? One of the great concerns of the Founders was the nefarious encroachment of factions...did they actually manage to develop a system that would eventually blur or erase the lines between factions?
I don't really have an answer for all this, I just think it's interesting to think about and couldn't raise it in class because it wasn't really germane. But it's interesting to think about how one document, written hundreds of years ago, could develop into the current society and government.
Seriously, people, I got a 30 on my first quiz. Raise your hand if you think I'm actually that dumb.
The course is kind of a "Constitutional Law...with a twist!" kind of scene. We're going to be looking at the Constitution and how it's shaped law and government, then seeing how all that good stuff syncs up with current Constitutional issues like those at hand in Guantanamo Bay, with wiretapping, etc. The Professor is interested in that stuff, and it shows. Today, he handed out an article about how Democrats are squabbling (...I KNOW! So unusual and exciting!) about the superdelegates. For those who have been under a rock or just in a closet, twitching with election fatigue, the Democratic party has two candidates pretty close in delegate counts, and it looks like it will all come down to the votes of superdelegates, who are party muckety-mucks and have a full vote at the convention. Both the HRC and Obama camps are complaining about how this isn't fair, for varying reasons, and basically I think it's all stupid.
TANGENT ALERT*****TANGENT ALERT*****TANGENT ALERT
Look, here's my deal with the electoral college. In theory, I'm down with it. I'm okay with a representative democracy, that's fine, delegate it up. If I had my pick, I'd make it a national primary, over, done, no Iowa, no New Hampshire, no SuperTuesday, just everyone voting, minimal angst. However, in the current system, I really think we'd all benefit from switching to having the same system in both parties, by which I mean I think everyone should have primaries, NOT CAUCUSES (which are stupid), and the hell with superdelegates. The Democrats are supposed to be the party of the people, yet they integrate backroom smoke-and-mirroring into their candidate selection right out in the open! Reason I am totally making my own political party #98456265874658917659.
END TANGENT*****END TANGENT*****END TANGENT
In any case, I got to thinking about the genesis of the American electorate, and how the past three cycles have involved this kind of very close contest. It's been most notable in the Bush election cycles in 2000 and 2004, but has seeped into the primary process this year. I wonder if this closeness is an inevitable result of Constitutional structure or just a flukey coincidence. I think it's tough to say definitively.
Personally, I feel like it has a lot to do with the decline of voter turnout and the rise of "specialized" voting blocs, i.e. evangelicals turning out for Huckabee, anti-gay marriage blocs turning out for Bush. This might fall into that black hole of inevitability. The Constitution lead to the development of a capitalist society with a screening process for participation. Doesn't this make it seem like we were bound to wind up at this point? There's no national holiday for election day...people are reluctant to take the time off. Further, this means that the worse the economy gets, which most would agree is a good time for people to tune in and participate, the less likely people are to participate, because they can't afford the time off and corresponding hit in pay.
Though the above problems seem very modern, they're also a by-product of the society with which the Founders endowed us. When you read the Constitution and consider what has sprung forth from it, the document itself seems so...vague. It almost seems like that boss who gives you the employee handbook with a bunch of rules about what time to show up and how to avoid sexual harassment, then immediately starts saying things like "I want to make a rocket for lunar travel...and let's involved a kids' charity" before leaving the room and letting you figure out what the hell he's talking about and where you're going to get a rocket. It laid down fairly basic ground rules, but since then, we've developed a gigantic government and a sprawling legal system. The things that WERE specified formed a commercial republic, guaranteeing people would always be capitalistically driven and constantl held at an arm's length from actual political engagement.
With all that in mind, where are we now? Were we destined to wind up voting as blocs and electing Presidents by a hair's width? One of the great concerns of the Founders was the nefarious encroachment of factions...did they actually manage to develop a system that would eventually blur or erase the lines between factions?
I don't really have an answer for all this, I just think it's interesting to think about and couldn't raise it in class because it wasn't really germane. But it's interesting to think about how one document, written hundreds of years ago, could develop into the current society and government.
Tuesday, March 4, 2008
I Want I Want I Want
I want a sandal that...
...is not made by the Crocs people.
...is not made for surfers.
...does not have a platform three inches tall.
...is not a flipflop.
...does not have seventeen pounds of spangly shit on it.
...maybe has SOME spangly shit on it.
...is not a flipflop PLUS a four inch heel. (Dude WTF?)
...is not a uniquely hideous color.
...is not black.
...is not white.
...does not take twenty minutes of strapping to put on.
...will not fall off when walking is attempted.
...does not go all the way up to my knee.
...has a heel JUST enough to make my calves look good.
...works with at least 50% of my dresses.
...whose deployment can be figured out by looking.
Why is this so hard? I just want a cute fucking sandal!
...is not made by the Crocs people.
...is not made for surfers.
...does not have a platform three inches tall.
...is not a flipflop.
...does not have seventeen pounds of spangly shit on it.
...maybe has SOME spangly shit on it.
...is not a flipflop PLUS a four inch heel. (Dude WTF?)
...is not a uniquely hideous color.
...is not black.
...is not white.
...does not take twenty minutes of strapping to put on.
...will not fall off when walking is attempted.
...does not go all the way up to my knee.
...has a heel JUST enough to make my calves look good.
...works with at least 50% of my dresses.
...whose deployment can be figured out by looking.
Why is this so hard? I just want a cute fucking sandal!
Things That Are Great
There are a lot of things that are crappy in the world. There's no shortage of bad stuff going down, at home and abroad, stupidity is eating the collective American mind, people are poor and frustrated and pissed off and fighty.
However, there are also lots of good things.
One of those good things is the chance for car phone salesman with funky teeth and a phenomenal voice to get heard and get signed to a contract for one of the biggest labels in the world.
The Plant People Are Taunting Me
Every year around this time, the usual stash of catalogs gets infiltrated by devious, devious nursery catalogs, and every year around this time, I immediately start planning how best to turn my back "yard" (for which read: jungle) into an American Garden of Versailles.
There are not enough machetes in the world.
This year, I am happy to report, I actually managed to have my act sufficiently together to get some bulbs in the ground, so I look forward to seeing how THAT experiment works out. I also just finished giving our wisteria tree a vicious pruning, and hope that it flowers this year. For something that left to its own devices will haul your house off into the wilderness to digest it, wisteria sure is pissy about being moved. Last year was its first year in our yard, and it just refused to bloom. Ingrate. However, I think all of my perennials came back, and my clematis geeked out, so hopefully that extravaganza will be repeated.
Hoped for Results from Things Currently in Ground
1. Clematis blooming and accepting a transfer to the lightpost.
2. Wisteria blooming
3. Rhododendrons finally achieving inner peace after years of neglect
4. Bulbs blooming without incident
5. Sweet Bay Magnolia surviving the winter and flourishing
Okay, so some things are in motion, and the front yard is mostly in good shape. However, the back yard still has miles to go, and I need to fill in the front gardens a little. When I started out with the front garden, I left some pernicious spiderwort to its own devices because it was clumpy and fleshed out the spaces between what I could actually grow. I have since ousted it from the yard, and let me tell you - if you have spiderwort, just get rid of it. Holy CRAP. If that stuff wasn't plotting a takeover with the wisteria, it was in cahoots with the Soviets.
So there's the layout - the blob with a dot in it at the end of the driveway is a kind of scrungy dirt patch with our giant oak tree in the middle (the blob). When we moved in, there were two beautiful but ailing rhododendrons on the property, one at the bottom, near the oak, and the other up near the steps to the front door. They hadn't been pruned or...dealt with in general until we got there and I gave them a violent but effective pruning. Now, they seem much happier, and the one from the bottom of the driveway is now on the other side of the steps with it's cousin, and we put two more really stunning rhodies in this amazing reddish-purply color I'd never seen before, a red azalea, and a smallish pine tree in the same bed. Right now, there are some daffodils gestating in the same bed, as well.
The floating garden in the middle was a huge project - it was a weed factory when we moved in. I ripped almost everything out, and we regrettably had to take down a totally glorious and wonderful Japanese Maple from the same area. I still am sad about that - we would have moved it, but it was dripping water onto the roof, and it was also where the carpenter ants lived, so it had to go. Totally sucks. However, I got some edging into the defoliated garden, used the rocks I found (NB: Holden is made mostly of rocks) to edge the back of the garden, and planted a bunch of perennials, which seem to be happy. We also put the wisteria in the vicinity of the Japanese Maple's previous spot.
This year, I'm comin' for the backyard.
Here's the grand plan for the Total Garden and Yard Makeover. I want to get a tomato plant cranking from the little hookie-do I mounted on the garage, because it's supersunny and the tomatoes will love the heat from the blacktop. I want to put some kind of bush at the bottom of the driveway with the oak tree. The front garden needs to be filled in, hopefully with some nice perennials, including a sorbet peony, which is gorgeous.
In the back, I want to install a shade garden in the back behind the shed attached to the garage, and in so doing remove the random rubbermaid bins that are back there for no reason. On the opposite side of the house, I want to put in a nice garden that will detract from the bulkhead (hate!), and use a birdbath for both cat entertainment purposes and space filling purposes. In the back corner of the yard (read: the only section thus far cleared of brush), I'd ultimately like to put down a stone patio, with corner pieces drilled with holes so I can set up the cabana back there in summer. Finally, I want to deal with the heinous AquaFresh-green chain link fence. I'd REALLY like to get one of those white picket-y fences that are made of plastic so you can just hose them off, but since they're freaking EIGHTY DOLLARS A SECTION I have to wait until I hit the lottery. In the meantime, I think I'm going to spraypaint the current fence black, then plant some lilacs along it so we don't have quite as clear a view into the nice people next door's yard.
All that being said, here are a bunch of pictures of pretty stuff I hope to put in my garden this year.
This is a ground cover rose called Apricot Princess (I think they should have the OPI nail polish people start naming roses, because it's seriously getting tired...is there any color on earth that someone hasn't slapped a "princess" at the end of and called it a day?). It's low to the ground, it's orange, the colors change as it matures, and it's pretty. Plus, Speed loves orange, so this should get a thumbs up from him.
I hope to put a couple of these suckers along my hideous fence in the backyard. This particular color is the Beauty of Moscow lilac, and I just love it. I also should admit here that if you make a Russian Connection to anything, I'll probably at least try it. I am cheap.
These are Green Envy Coneflowers, and let me tell you, the picture here is doing them zero justice. I don't really love coneflowers as a genre, but I think the green with red is just so interesting and pretty that I'm totally won over.
I love how a lot of flowers sound like horrible, usually venereal, diseases. This one is an Isaac House Scabiosa. "What'd you do this weekend, Jos?" "Oh, not much...picked up some scabiosa." "*hushed voice* Oh my god, are you okay? Did they give you medication?"
I am not a hosta person. My mom is MUCH more into the foliage Thing than I am, and she LOOOOOOVES hostas, as do many people in this area particularly, but I have never really gotten into them. I mean, they're...fine, but boring. THESE, however, are fabulous. I love how clear the contrast is between the green and white. They're called Loyalist hosta.
When I was little, we had this random kids book called (I think) "The Lupine Lady," which involved a woman who went around flinging lupine seeds all over the place, and then one day the lupines all bloomed and she had single-handedly made the world more beautiful. It was a really beautiful book, and I loved the idea of all these lupines springing up everywhere, so I have totally romanticized them by now and thus very much want this mix of them. The Magic of Google tells me that the book was actually called "Miss Rumphius" (...obviously) and was based on the author's great aunt, which is cool. Oh and PS she totally spends her life traveling and being fabulous and not fitting gender stereotypes, so y'all KNOW I just ordered that shit to put in my Pile of Potential Kid Books That Mostly I Read Because They Are Great.
Eeeee ranunculus! So pretty, no?? I TOTALLY cannot grow these in zone 5. That sucks so bad. Actually, I should consult Mom the Green Thumb, because she's always coming up with zone-defying tricks and calling shenanigans on assorted nurseries, so there could be hope. I just adore these...the bi-weekly floral arrangement at work today has yellow ranunculus in it, and it is MAKING my day. I might use some of these in my wedding flowers, especially since they come in every color ever.
This is apparently Thomas Jefferson's favorite plant, if the Spring Hill Nursery people can be believed. Well, I'm with ya, TJ, this is good stuff. I just think it's so interesting and funky, and it's definitely one of those "does as advertised" type things...it's called a shell plant.
THESE are the glorious sorbet peonies I mentioned above. I have had good luck with peonies, because as I said previously, Holden is made of rocks. This is great for peonies, because they apparently hate...nutrients. When I told Mom I was putting a couple in, her first comment was "okay, well don't put any manure near them." EVERY OTHER PLANT IN THE WORLD is all "yo, give me some of that good shit" but the peonies are like "I am rugged and independent. Keep your manure and leave me to produce giant, glorious flowers." No problemo, my surly friends. If you're going to bloom like this, that is a-ok with me.
There are not enough machetes in the world.
This year, I am happy to report, I actually managed to have my act sufficiently together to get some bulbs in the ground, so I look forward to seeing how THAT experiment works out. I also just finished giving our wisteria tree a vicious pruning, and hope that it flowers this year. For something that left to its own devices will haul your house off into the wilderness to digest it, wisteria sure is pissy about being moved. Last year was its first year in our yard, and it just refused to bloom. Ingrate. However, I think all of my perennials came back, and my clematis geeked out, so hopefully that extravaganza will be repeated.
Hoped for Results from Things Currently in Ground
1. Clematis blooming and accepting a transfer to the lightpost.
2. Wisteria blooming
3. Rhododendrons finally achieving inner peace after years of neglect
4. Bulbs blooming without incident
5. Sweet Bay Magnolia surviving the winter and flourishing
Okay, so some things are in motion, and the front yard is mostly in good shape. However, the back yard still has miles to go, and I need to fill in the front gardens a little. When I started out with the front garden, I left some pernicious spiderwort to its own devices because it was clumpy and fleshed out the spaces between what I could actually grow. I have since ousted it from the yard, and let me tell you - if you have spiderwort, just get rid of it. Holy CRAP. If that stuff wasn't plotting a takeover with the wisteria, it was in cahoots with the Soviets.
So there's the layout - the blob with a dot in it at the end of the driveway is a kind of scrungy dirt patch with our giant oak tree in the middle (the blob). When we moved in, there were two beautiful but ailing rhododendrons on the property, one at the bottom, near the oak, and the other up near the steps to the front door. They hadn't been pruned or...dealt with in general until we got there and I gave them a violent but effective pruning. Now, they seem much happier, and the one from the bottom of the driveway is now on the other side of the steps with it's cousin, and we put two more really stunning rhodies in this amazing reddish-purply color I'd never seen before, a red azalea, and a smallish pine tree in the same bed. Right now, there are some daffodils gestating in the same bed, as well.The floating garden in the middle was a huge project - it was a weed factory when we moved in. I ripped almost everything out, and we regrettably had to take down a totally glorious and wonderful Japanese Maple from the same area. I still am sad about that - we would have moved it, but it was dripping water onto the roof, and it was also where the carpenter ants lived, so it had to go. Totally sucks. However, I got some edging into the defoliated garden, used the rocks I found (NB: Holden is made mostly of rocks) to edge the back of the garden, and planted a bunch of perennials, which seem to be happy. We also put the wisteria in the vicinity of the Japanese Maple's previous spot.
This year, I'm comin' for the backyard.
Here's the grand plan for the Total Garden and Yard Makeover. I want to get a tomato plant cranking from the little hookie-do I mounted on the garage, because it's supersunny and the tomatoes will love the heat from the blacktop. I want to put some kind of bush at the bottom of the driveway with the oak tree. The front garden needs to be filled in, hopefully with some nice perennials, including a sorbet peony, which is gorgeous.
In the back, I want to install a shade garden in the back behind the shed attached to the garage, and in so doing remove the random rubbermaid bins that are back there for no reason. On the opposite side of the house, I want to put in a nice garden that will detract from the bulkhead (hate!), and use a birdbath for both cat entertainment purposes and space filling purposes. In the back corner of the yard (read: the only section thus far cleared of brush), I'd ultimately like to put down a stone patio, with corner pieces drilled with holes so I can set up the cabana back there in summer. Finally, I want to deal with the heinous AquaFresh-green chain link fence. I'd REALLY like to get one of those white picket-y fences that are made of plastic so you can just hose them off, but since they're freaking EIGHTY DOLLARS A SECTION I have to wait until I hit the lottery. In the meantime, I think I'm going to spraypaint the current fence black, then plant some lilacs along it so we don't have quite as clear a view into the nice people next door's yard.
All that being said, here are a bunch of pictures of pretty stuff I hope to put in my garden this year.
This is a ground cover rose called Apricot Princess (I think they should have the OPI nail polish people start naming roses, because it's seriously getting tired...is there any color on earth that someone hasn't slapped a "princess" at the end of and called it a day?). It's low to the ground, it's orange, the colors change as it matures, and it's pretty. Plus, Speed loves orange, so this should get a thumbs up from him.
I hope to put a couple of these suckers along my hideous fence in the backyard. This particular color is the Beauty of Moscow lilac, and I just love it. I also should admit here that if you make a Russian Connection to anything, I'll probably at least try it. I am cheap.
These are Green Envy Coneflowers, and let me tell you, the picture here is doing them zero justice. I don't really love coneflowers as a genre, but I think the green with red is just so interesting and pretty that I'm totally won over.
I love how a lot of flowers sound like horrible, usually venereal, diseases. This one is an Isaac House Scabiosa. "What'd you do this weekend, Jos?" "Oh, not much...picked up some scabiosa." "*hushed voice* Oh my god, are you okay? Did they give you medication?"
I am not a hosta person. My mom is MUCH more into the foliage Thing than I am, and she LOOOOOOVES hostas, as do many people in this area particularly, but I have never really gotten into them. I mean, they're...fine, but boring. THESE, however, are fabulous. I love how clear the contrast is between the green and white. They're called Loyalist hosta.
When I was little, we had this random kids book called (I think) "The Lupine Lady," which involved a woman who went around flinging lupine seeds all over the place, and then one day the lupines all bloomed and she had single-handedly made the world more beautiful. It was a really beautiful book, and I loved the idea of all these lupines springing up everywhere, so I have totally romanticized them by now and thus very much want this mix of them. The Magic of Google tells me that the book was actually called "Miss Rumphius" (...obviously) and was based on the author's great aunt, which is cool. Oh and PS she totally spends her life traveling and being fabulous and not fitting gender stereotypes, so y'all KNOW I just ordered that shit to put in my Pile of Potential Kid Books That Mostly I Read Because They Are Great.
Eeeee ranunculus! So pretty, no?? I TOTALLY cannot grow these in zone 5. That sucks so bad. Actually, I should consult Mom the Green Thumb, because she's always coming up with zone-defying tricks and calling shenanigans on assorted nurseries, so there could be hope. I just adore these...the bi-weekly floral arrangement at work today has yellow ranunculus in it, and it is MAKING my day. I might use some of these in my wedding flowers, especially since they come in every color ever.
This is apparently Thomas Jefferson's favorite plant, if the Spring Hill Nursery people can be believed. Well, I'm with ya, TJ, this is good stuff. I just think it's so interesting and funky, and it's definitely one of those "does as advertised" type things...it's called a shell plant.
THESE are the glorious sorbet peonies I mentioned above. I have had good luck with peonies, because as I said previously, Holden is made of rocks. This is great for peonies, because they apparently hate...nutrients. When I told Mom I was putting a couple in, her first comment was "okay, well don't put any manure near them." EVERY OTHER PLANT IN THE WORLD is all "yo, give me some of that good shit" but the peonies are like "I am rugged and independent. Keep your manure and leave me to produce giant, glorious flowers." No problemo, my surly friends. If you're going to bloom like this, that is a-ok with me.
Monday, March 3, 2008
The During and the After
I'm watching A&E's show Paranormal State, which I enjoy mostly for it's status as pure comedic gold. The show tracks Penn State's Paranormal Research Society, a ghost/spirit/energy hunting group headed up by a kid named Ryan, who provides most of the humor. Apparently, when he was younger he had some paranormal experiences, and carried an interest in the subject through to college, where he managed to found this society, which allows him to make every case and bump in the night about him. I do actually find the subject matter interesting, but it's this kid's approach to it all that kind of removes it from the possibility of getting too serious. One thing that it does sweetly remind me of is just how much a college environment becomes your oyster if you're a bit of a force of nature yourself, which this kid clearly is.
That being said, the subject matter is fascinating to me, not only from a Where We Go When We Die perspective, but also from a more mystical place. I feel like much of Christianity doesn't quite deal with the afterlife or lack thereof in a manner that covers the paranormal activity that goes on. (For more on why I swear I'm not nuts, hang tight for a paragraph or two.) The general understanding is that you die, and you go to heaven, hell, or purgatory, according to your mileage/doctrine. There's relatively little said about people who just...hang. Generally, I find that Christians of any stripe, pressed for explanations, will say that any paranormal "stuff" is evidence of a demon or angel making a quick stop in. That doesn't really jive with me. I dunno. I'm sure there are mundane angels and average demons, but I've always kind of thought of angels as exceptional souls, elevated to a position of glory in heaven, and vice versa for demons. Maybe it's more adversarial than others would like, but I like to think of angels as my backup, in case the Divine Shit ever hits the Divine Fan and all that Armageddon jazz actually goes down. I want someone special weilding the flaming swords, you know? Not...well, not, frankly, the etherial version of myself. When I went out shooting with my friend the Marine, I could sorta deal with a Glock 9, but a .45 caliber gun was simply beyond me, and this is the kind of stuff that indicates that I should stick with not joining the armed forces. Does that make sense?
What about people who just hang around and knock wine glasses off tables or make rapping noises in the middle of the night? Shouldn't angels and demons be occupied with more pressing matters, be it a boring staff meeting with the Lord or some kind of Hellblazer style war of good and evil? And in most descriptions of heaven and hell, your soul goes SOMEWHERE, leaves the earthly plane, and has a bunch of stuff to do. Well, okay, so where does moving people's shit around come into that agenda? I'm not really sure if any religion has come up with an explanation for that level of petty participation to my satisfaction. Most non-Christian religions either have a similar if-you're-good-you-go-here, if-you're-bad-you-go-there concept, or else say something to the effect of your soul's energy dispersing or being recycled, in which case there's still not a lot of hang time for people to chill and pester their relatives.
When I lived in Bethesda, I lived in a two bedroom apartment with a friend of mine. We had this bathroom that for all intents and purposes we should have loved, but...I didn't, quite. It was all retroed out, and we painted the walls hot pink, which looked SO fly against the black and white tile that was there, but I still didn't particularly love being in there, and I am totally a bathroom hang-out person. Even with the nice decor, I just didn't get the chill out vibe in there, and I didn't spend any more time than I needed to in there...for instance, I tended to do my eyebrows in my bedroom with a handheld mirror. Weird, but not too weird, I mean...who contemplates their relationship with their bathroom?
One night, my roommate and I were both in the bathroom for some reason. But all of a sudden, we got this overwhelming feeling that someone was in there with us - I couldn't even bring myself to turn around and look at the shower because I was SO sure someone was going to be there. We both stopped what we were doing at almost the same moment, looked at each other, and my roommate said "someone's in here." The VERY SECOND she said it, all the lights went out, throughout the entire bathroom.
I don't know if I've ever felt so terrified.
We shrieked, grabbed each other, and sprinted into my roommate's bedroom, where we lit every candle we could find, jumped into bed, and stayed fucking put for the rest of the night. We decided after much discussion that something bad must have happened in the apartment, in the bathroom, or someone must have been very sad or angry, just all of the time. It was just such an intense feeling, for no reason whatsoever, that I can't explain it, and I've tried. So the short story is that I believe in ghosts, though I might not understand in a theological sense how they "work." After that night, there's no way I can't believe in them.
And to the man - because it was a man - in my bathroom in Bethesda...I hope everything is okay for you now.
That being said, the subject matter is fascinating to me, not only from a Where We Go When We Die perspective, but also from a more mystical place. I feel like much of Christianity doesn't quite deal with the afterlife or lack thereof in a manner that covers the paranormal activity that goes on. (For more on why I swear I'm not nuts, hang tight for a paragraph or two.) The general understanding is that you die, and you go to heaven, hell, or purgatory, according to your mileage/doctrine. There's relatively little said about people who just...hang. Generally, I find that Christians of any stripe, pressed for explanations, will say that any paranormal "stuff" is evidence of a demon or angel making a quick stop in. That doesn't really jive with me. I dunno. I'm sure there are mundane angels and average demons, but I've always kind of thought of angels as exceptional souls, elevated to a position of glory in heaven, and vice versa for demons. Maybe it's more adversarial than others would like, but I like to think of angels as my backup, in case the Divine Shit ever hits the Divine Fan and all that Armageddon jazz actually goes down. I want someone special weilding the flaming swords, you know? Not...well, not, frankly, the etherial version of myself. When I went out shooting with my friend the Marine, I could sorta deal with a Glock 9, but a .45 caliber gun was simply beyond me, and this is the kind of stuff that indicates that I should stick with not joining the armed forces. Does that make sense?
What about people who just hang around and knock wine glasses off tables or make rapping noises in the middle of the night? Shouldn't angels and demons be occupied with more pressing matters, be it a boring staff meeting with the Lord or some kind of Hellblazer style war of good and evil? And in most descriptions of heaven and hell, your soul goes SOMEWHERE, leaves the earthly plane, and has a bunch of stuff to do. Well, okay, so where does moving people's shit around come into that agenda? I'm not really sure if any religion has come up with an explanation for that level of petty participation to my satisfaction. Most non-Christian religions either have a similar if-you're-good-you-go-here, if-you're-bad-you-go-there concept, or else say something to the effect of your soul's energy dispersing or being recycled, in which case there's still not a lot of hang time for people to chill and pester their relatives.
When I lived in Bethesda, I lived in a two bedroom apartment with a friend of mine. We had this bathroom that for all intents and purposes we should have loved, but...I didn't, quite. It was all retroed out, and we painted the walls hot pink, which looked SO fly against the black and white tile that was there, but I still didn't particularly love being in there, and I am totally a bathroom hang-out person. Even with the nice decor, I just didn't get the chill out vibe in there, and I didn't spend any more time than I needed to in there...for instance, I tended to do my eyebrows in my bedroom with a handheld mirror. Weird, but not too weird, I mean...who contemplates their relationship with their bathroom?
One night, my roommate and I were both in the bathroom for some reason. But all of a sudden, we got this overwhelming feeling that someone was in there with us - I couldn't even bring myself to turn around and look at the shower because I was SO sure someone was going to be there. We both stopped what we were doing at almost the same moment, looked at each other, and my roommate said "someone's in here." The VERY SECOND she said it, all the lights went out, throughout the entire bathroom.
I don't know if I've ever felt so terrified.
We shrieked, grabbed each other, and sprinted into my roommate's bedroom, where we lit every candle we could find, jumped into bed, and stayed fucking put for the rest of the night. We decided after much discussion that something bad must have happened in the apartment, in the bathroom, or someone must have been very sad or angry, just all of the time. It was just such an intense feeling, for no reason whatsoever, that I can't explain it, and I've tried. So the short story is that I believe in ghosts, though I might not understand in a theological sense how they "work." After that night, there's no way I can't believe in them.
And to the man - because it was a man - in my bathroom in Bethesda...I hope everything is okay for you now.
Sunday, March 2, 2008
The Plague
I am no longer sick.
I'm quite excited about this, because I am not a fan of my body's platform on disease. Most of the time, I don't have anything to worry about outside of self-inflicted injury, chapped lips and sporatic allergies. Then, once or twice a year, my body basically decides to reject all of my white blood cells and antibodies at once, and posts an "Open House! Today Only! Bring Friends!" sign on my head, at which point a collection of virulent and fighty diseases come by to scope out the place and see if there's any good stuff to steal.
Oh. My. GOD you guys.
I had a sore throat, which, okay, but I also had a cold and a cough, which as many of you may know, means that every time you use your throat-and-nosal regions for coughing or sneezeing, it feels like someone is trying to rip the lining of your esophagus directly out of your body like some kind of messed up torture porn movie. This year's version also had some exciting mucus features, so every now and then I would start coughing, become totally unable to stop, choke for an exciting couple of seconds, and then expel something that looked eerily like a member of the slug family into whatever unfortunate cup or sink was on hand.
Yes, I realize that is disgusting but frankly you didn't have to experience it so I don't care.
Needless to say, I also spent the last couple days sounding like an eighty-year-old, thirteen-pack-a-day-smoker. It was a charming time for all involved. That all being said, I am announcing this illness now so that you can all write Speed and I permanently off your social calendars for the next three months. You see, we believe that SHARING IS CARING, and thus when one of us contracts the Annual Disease Fest, we pass it joyfully along from one to the other, back and forth, for a good couple months.
At least we're stocked up on cough drops.
I'm quite excited about this, because I am not a fan of my body's platform on disease. Most of the time, I don't have anything to worry about outside of self-inflicted injury, chapped lips and sporatic allergies. Then, once or twice a year, my body basically decides to reject all of my white blood cells and antibodies at once, and posts an "Open House! Today Only! Bring Friends!" sign on my head, at which point a collection of virulent and fighty diseases come by to scope out the place and see if there's any good stuff to steal.
Oh. My. GOD you guys.
I had a sore throat, which, okay, but I also had a cold and a cough, which as many of you may know, means that every time you use your throat-and-nosal regions for coughing or sneezeing, it feels like someone is trying to rip the lining of your esophagus directly out of your body like some kind of messed up torture porn movie. This year's version also had some exciting mucus features, so every now and then I would start coughing, become totally unable to stop, choke for an exciting couple of seconds, and then expel something that looked eerily like a member of the slug family into whatever unfortunate cup or sink was on hand.
Yes, I realize that is disgusting but frankly you didn't have to experience it so I don't care.
Needless to say, I also spent the last couple days sounding like an eighty-year-old, thirteen-pack-a-day-smoker. It was a charming time for all involved. That all being said, I am announcing this illness now so that you can all write Speed and I permanently off your social calendars for the next three months. You see, we believe that SHARING IS CARING, and thus when one of us contracts the Annual Disease Fest, we pass it joyfully along from one to the other, back and forth, for a good couple months.
At least we're stocked up on cough drops.
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